Thankfully, former Green Bay Packers coach Mike McCarthy
apologized for his verbal abuse toward a high school official at his stepson’s
basketball game.
What McCarthy’s actions did was shed light on what has been
a regular problem at youth sporting events at all levels in all sports. And
sadly, it doesn’t appear to be slowing down.
You should be concerned by that.
Several weeks ago, an editorial was released about the state
of youth sports officials and how it is becoming increasingly difficult to get
people to sign up to be an official. The editorial spoke of many reasons, but
one of the standout reasons was people being sick and tired of being verbally,
even physically abused in some cases, at youth sporting events. It’s why I will
never be a youth sports official. I’m even leery to be a youth coach.
Having played and growing up around youth sports, I’ve seen
the progression. I remember being about 8 or 9 years old playing a Little
League baseball game and dad of a friend of mine was asked to leave the premises
after constant berating by him toward the umpire. The umpire had enough and
asked the man to leave. I also remember a parent being ejected by an umpire at
my sister’s softball game when she was about 11 or 12 years old (I’m two years
older than her).
And this is in the late 1980s, early 1990s.
My belief is club sports had a role in it. I graduated from
high school in 2000. That was about the time club sports and travel teams were
becoming a thing. Today, it’s far more prevalent and often the preferred route
for student-athletes, rather than competing for their respective school in any
sport.
We won’t get into sports specialization because that’s not
what this commentary is about.
But what club sports and travel teams have done is bring out
the worst in people simply because those avenues aren’t cheap. Parents often
dish out thousands of dollars in hopes of their children getting the coveted
athletic scholarship. So what happens? Parents are less patient with a coach
and/or an official and therefore get mean, rude and disrespectful.
In January, I visited my in-laws in Michigan where my
father-in-law is an attorney. I went with him to watch a few court cases
because I was curious of how the court system operates in Michigan and to see
my father-in-law in action. But while I was in a courtroom waiting for the next
case, I talked with a man who gloated about his son’s wrestling career. I
understand he was a proud father. Don’t get me wrong. What I had a problem with
was this boy was 12 years old, had been to more than 10 states to compete and
was wrestling nearly year-round. When so much is invested in something,
patience and reasoning takes a back seat to pressure.
I’ve been to several youth sporting events during my career
where things got unruly between parents. One example was a few years ago while
covering the Wisconsin Little Ten Conference’s wrestling tournament at
Oconomowoc High School. A fight amongst parents broke out and cops had to be
called.
A few weeks ago, a video went viral of a fight involving
parents broke out at a wrestling tournament at Kimberly. I watched the video
several times in massive disappointment, thinking, “What do the kids of those
parents think? They must be embarrassed.”
I’ve seen parents go to a basketball scorer’s table to make
sure their son or daughter got the points if it was announced differently over
the PA system. I’ve seen parents lean over their son’s or daughter’s shoulders
on the bench and talk to them. Unless you’re asked to intervene, parents need
to keep their butts in the stands.
Voicing displeasure over a call by an official in a game is
part of it. Always has and always will. Where it crosses the line is the
constant bombardment, so much as to even making it personal, which I’ve also
seen happen. I’ve yet to see one parent berate an official and then see that
same parent pick up the referee uniform and whistle and do it themselves. If
you can do it better, then prove it.
I know I will be supportive of my kids in whatever they do.
But I’ve made a promise to myself and my wife that I won’t act like a fool.
Berating coaches and officials is hurting youth athletics.
And this is what should be done.
Those people ejected from youth sporting events for unruly
behavior should be cited for disorderly conduct and then barred from athletic
events for one year.
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