Monday, March 4, 2019

COLUMN: Behavior at youth sporting events need to cool it



Thankfully, former Green Bay Packers coach Mike McCarthy apologized for his verbal abuse toward a high school official at his stepson’s basketball game.

What McCarthy’s actions did was shed light on what has been a regular problem at youth sporting events at all levels in all sports. And sadly, it doesn’t appear to be slowing down.

You should be concerned by that.

Several weeks ago, an editorial was released about the state of youth sports officials and how it is becoming increasingly difficult to get people to sign up to be an official. The editorial spoke of many reasons, but one of the standout reasons was people being sick and tired of being verbally, even physically abused in some cases, at youth sporting events. It’s why I will never be a youth sports official. I’m even leery to be a youth coach.

Having played and growing up around youth sports, I’ve seen the progression. I remember being about 8 or 9 years old playing a Little League baseball game and dad of a friend of mine was asked to leave the premises after constant berating by him toward the umpire. The umpire had enough and asked the man to leave. I also remember a parent being ejected by an umpire at my sister’s softball game when she was about 11 or 12 years old (I’m two years older than her).

And this is in the late 1980s, early 1990s.

My belief is club sports had a role in it. I graduated from high school in 2000. That was about the time club sports and travel teams were becoming a thing. Today, it’s far more prevalent and often the preferred route for student-athletes, rather than competing for their respective school in any sport.

We won’t get into sports specialization because that’s not what this commentary is about.

But what club sports and travel teams have done is bring out the worst in people simply because those avenues aren’t cheap. Parents often dish out thousands of dollars in hopes of their children getting the coveted athletic scholarship. So what happens? Parents are less patient with a coach and/or an official and therefore get mean, rude and disrespectful.

In January, I visited my in-laws in Michigan where my father-in-law is an attorney. I went with him to watch a few court cases because I was curious of how the court system operates in Michigan and to see my father-in-law in action. But while I was in a courtroom waiting for the next case, I talked with a man who gloated about his son’s wrestling career. I understand he was a proud father. Don’t get me wrong. What I had a problem with was this boy was 12 years old, had been to more than 10 states to compete and was wrestling nearly year-round. When so much is invested in something, patience and reasoning takes a back seat to pressure.

I’ve been to several youth sporting events during my career where things got unruly between parents. One example was a few years ago while covering the Wisconsin Little Ten Conference’s wrestling tournament at Oconomowoc High School. A fight amongst parents broke out and cops had to be called.

A few weeks ago, a video went viral of a fight involving parents broke out at a wrestling tournament at Kimberly. I watched the video several times in massive disappointment, thinking, “What do the kids of those parents think? They must be embarrassed.”

I’ve seen parents go to a basketball scorer’s table to make sure their son or daughter got the points if it was announced differently over the PA system. I’ve seen parents lean over their son’s or daughter’s shoulders on the bench and talk to them. Unless you’re asked to intervene, parents need to keep their butts in the stands.

Voicing displeasure over a call by an official in a game is part of it. Always has and always will. Where it crosses the line is the constant bombardment, so much as to even making it personal, which I’ve also seen happen. I’ve yet to see one parent berate an official and then see that same parent pick up the referee uniform and whistle and do it themselves. If you can do it better, then prove it.

I know I will be supportive of my kids in whatever they do. But I’ve made a promise to myself and my wife that I won’t act like a fool.

Berating coaches and officials is hurting youth athletics. And this is what should be done.

Those people ejected from youth sporting events for unruly behavior should be cited for disorderly conduct and then barred from athletic events for one year.

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