Daily News (West Bend, Wis.)
Published: Jan. 26, 2019
An unconventional idea by two local
nonprofits helped a family that was homeless and in disarray get back on their
feet
By Nicholas Dettmann
WEST BEND — Jordan Thiede, a
sophomore at West Bend East High School, wants to go to culinary school and
become a chef.
“I like cooking a lot,” he said.
He likes to cook just about anything
— except fish.
Having the dream of going to
culinary school was a distant one about a year ago.
At that time, his family was broken.
Mom and dad were both caught up in drug and alcohol addictions. Mom was
addicted to heroin and alcohol, while Dad was addicted to crack.
While close with his siblings, they
were drifting apart. Jordan’s oldest brother, Tyler, joined the Army and his
sister, Hailey, left to live with a friend.
Nineteen months ago, the Thiedes
found themselves living in a tent in a campground. At that moment, Sheri Thiede
said enough was enough. She picked up the phone and called Family Promise of
Washington County.
“We were desperate,” Sheri said. “We
were so broken.”
Sheri, who had been dealing with
addiction for more than 30 years — since she was a teenager — said that phone
call plus the work of the staff at Family Promise saved her life and her
family.
“I want my children to grow up and
be successful,” Sheri said when asked why she made the call.
Fast-forward nineteen months.
On a chilly Monday afternoon, Sheri,
along with Hailey and Jordan, are in a place they can call home, one with
bedrooms, bathrooms, and, more importantly, heating and a roof. They have that
not only because of hard work, but also the collaborative effort of two
nonprofits in Washington County.
“This is the success story we’ve
been looking for,” said Lori Prescott, executive director at Family Promise.
“With Big Brothers Big Sisters (of Washington County) helping this way, one of
our clients that have black marks on their record. This helps them in a huge
way that they are back on their feet. They’re trying to right those marks.”
❑❑❑
The idea that changed a family,
maybe a county
In November, a three-bedroom, two-bath
apartment above Big Brothers Big Sisters of Washington County’s office in
downtown West Bend became vacant. A staff meeting was held to figure out what
to do with the space.
Nikky Naumann blurted out the idea.
“Why not use that space to help out
because we knew Family Promise was full and this other household would have to
go to a completely different county so I was like, ‘Why don’t we just use
upstairs instead of trying to find another tenant?’” she said.
When the idea was said, there was
disbelief in the room. After a moment was taken to let that comment sink in,
Jaymee Harvey Willms, executive director at BBBS, couldn’t believe what she
heard.
“I was mad because I didn’t think of it,” she
said with a smile.
From there, the conversations between BBBS and
Family Promise picked up. The work to make it happen also got going. Two months
later, the Thiedes were no longer in the care of Family Promise. They were in a
place they could call home and the family was coming back together.
“For the longest time, I didn’t think it was
possible,” Jordan said. “I didn’t think I would ever see this happening.”
Harvey Willms said she hopes the collaboration
between BBBS and Family Promise is the start of something greater in Washington
County.
Several weeks ago, United Way of Washington
County hosted a large discussion, featuring representatives from nonprofits and
local business leaders to discuss the needs of the community. A common theme
was a suggestion for nonprofits to work in unison on more projects, think
outside the proverbial box when looking at how to help those in need with
whatever they need.
“I’ve been working with different nonprofits in
this county for four years,” Harvey Willms said. “And over and over and over
again I’ve had families come to me whose life is hard and ask for help. It is
the worst feeling in the world to not be able to give it.
“Every time I meet a new executive director or
a team member from a different nonprofit, I’m like, ‘Oh. That’s what I needed
two years ago.’” BBBS and Family Promise may have — and hopefully — opened up a
floodgate that could only bode well for Washington County and its residents.
“I think the more resources we can connect for
people, the stronger Washington County is,” Harvey Willms said.
❑❑❑
The struggle
Prescott remembers when Sheri arrived at the
facility.
“Her case was a tough one,” Prescott said. “She
was struggling with addiction.”
Sheri said she called Family Promise because
she couldn’t stand the idea of living in a tent
on a campground with a 14-year-old son and that
her older children had left. “I just couldn’t deal with it anymore,” Hailey
said.
So, Jordan and his mom went to Family Promise,
where they stayed for about 18 months. Jordan noticed several things right
away.
“When we walked in, a lot changed real
quickly,” he said. “After we went to the Promise Center, it was always up,
never down.”
That was refreshing, for once.
“It’s definitely been a tough a lot of times,”
Jordan said about the days, weeks and months leading into that stay.
Jordan called it the lowest point he’d ever seen
his family.
“For the longest time, the best way to put it,
I was the adult taking care of my mom and dad because they weren’t able to at
the time,” Jordan said. “They were still recovering from being sober, using so
long and being sober again.”
Jordan has been a little at BBBS since he was
about 8 years old. His big, John Averkamp, has been an asset in his life as Mom
and Dad struggled with their addictions. Jordan called Averkamp the dad, the
big brother he yearned for.
Jordan and Hailey often struggled, too. They
lacked trust and reliability with their parents. Hailey said she felt
disconnected. So she left to live with a friend for six months.
When her mom and Jordan moved into Family
Promise, Hailey came back around.
“She was actually putting words into action,”
she said.
❑❑❑
Life pointed in right direction, a family is stronger
Outside of a lot of unpacking, Sheri said it’s
a miracle for her family to have reached this point.
“It’s chaos. ... It’s good chaos,” she said.
Their turnaround is inspiring, Prescott said.
“To see them and reconnect with her family,
it’s the story you want to see, the outcome you want to have,” Prescott said.
“I’m a mom. Before, I wasn’t a mom,” Sheri
said.
Sheri said she and the kids’ dad have put their
differences aside to create a united front for their children.
The bond within the family, especially between
Sheri and her children, have changed dramatically.
Jordan said he and his sister have always been close,
but it was hard because of how the family was being riddled with instability.
Now, when Hailey comes home from work, Jordan
proudly shouts to her, “Hi beautiful.”
“There’s a lot of times people don’t make it as
far as we did,” Jordan said. “It was a lot of struggle and a lot of
self-motivation.”
It was also at Family Promise that Jordan
discovered an interest in cooking.
“I’m so proud of her,” Jordan said. “There are
not a lot of women that are that strong that go from absolutely nothing to
this. I know a lot of people that would’ve just given up.”
As for the cooking, what was the first cooked
meal in the new home? Macaroni and cheese.
“It’s amazing what going from zero to this can
do,” Jordan said. “I can count on my mother. I can count on my sister.”
Now, Sheri is proud to be an advocate for
Family Promise and be a motivator for others in a similar situation. Her
message to them is simple.
“Don’t be ashamed,” she said.
She also said if she and her family can
overcome these obstacles, anyone can.
“She wants to give back in that way,” Prescott
said. “She has helped us promote her story, came to events we held and she’s
nervous to share to her story, but willing. She could be the best spokesperson
we have.”
